我谈过最长的恋爱是,自恋,没有情敌。
Ive been in love for 20 years, its narcissism without rival.
想跟家境相仿的人一起玩,有没有一起要饭的?
I want to play with people with similar family background.Do you want to beg together?
麻烦财神爷把我移出黑名单吧!我要暴富。
Please remove me from the blacklist. I want to be rich.
我是一个自律的人,既然说要减肥,那我就要天天说。
I am a self disciplined person.Since I want to lose weight,I have to say it every day.
掉头发的时候觉得自己是一颗蒲公英.
I feel like a dandelion when my hair falled out.
希望朋友圈的你们,烦恼跟你们的头发一样,越来越少。
I hope you in the circle of friends have lessand less troubles like your hair.
要不是空气免费,我都活不到现在。
If it wasn for free air, I wouldn have survived.
小肚子中有许多委屈,积攒多了,就变成小肚腩了。
There are a lot of grievances in the little belly. If you accumulate more grievances, you will become a little belly.
晚上一起看星星吗?我数星星,你笨,就数月亮吧!
Watch the stars at night? I count the stars, you are stupid,so you count the moon!
不要再问我为什么不谈恋爱了,你为什么不上清华?是因为不想上吗?
Don ask me why I don fall in love, Why don you go to Tsinghua? Because you don want to go?
我这个人特别讲义气,打我不行,打我朋友可以。
Im a very loyal person. you can beat me,but you can beat my friends.
今天又是沙雕的一天,希望看完文章的你们会开心一点点!
图源来自网络,侵权删,谢谢!